Motherhood as a Spiritual Path through Mental Health Awareness

by Shelley Karpaty

My search for healing and spirituality took flight in motherhood after my son's birth in 2002. Well, things never turn out how you’d imagine them to go, and he landed back in the hospital for a six-week NICU stay with a pile of medical ambiguity. And after the trauma was neatly tucked away somewhere in my body for many years, I learned and continue to learn how to manage the peaks and valleys of anxiety that motherhood brings. 

I fought for my own identity alongside motherhood. And with a handful of tumultuous, heartbreaking years in many moments of fear and surrender in parenting, I have learned more about myself than I ever would have without him. 

I am acknowledging challenges without naming the specifics on purpose. No matter what words I use, they are labels, and they stigmatize. They allow for the reader’s projections and compartmentalization, which might make you feel more comfortable; however, they don’t make me feel comfortable, and it’s a huge disservice to the mystery and beauty of life. 

Corporate capitalism does not work for my creative, quiet, resilient, empathic son. The path of rugged individualism, staking your claim, climbing your way to earn money, simply isn’t a path for him. And we can all learn from that. The path for him is unfolding in quiet, steady ways, and as his mother, I learn to quiet my own anxiety without projecting it upon him. Easier said than done, so I'm naming it to tame it.

Here’s what I want you to know about invisible disabilities

Invisible disabilities are physical, mental, or neurological conditions that aren’t immediately apparent to others but still significantly impact a person’s life. When it comes to mental health, conditions like depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, PTSD, and schizophrenia are just a few examples that can affect someone’s ability to work, socialize, or manage everyday tasks. 

Because these conditions often go unseen, people who live with them may feel misunderstood or even invalidated. They may hesitate to seek help for fear of being dismissed or judged, adding further stress to their experience.

Mental health challenges are more common than many people think. 

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, more than 57 million adults in the U.S. live with a diagnosable mental health challenge, equal to about one in five. Roughly one in 25 adults experiences a serious mental health issue that significantly disrupts one or more areas of life, such as work or relationships. (Center for People with Disabilities)

Living with a mental health-related disability can feel like carrying a heavy but invisible weight. To the outside world, everything may look “normal,” but inside, a person may be battling fatigue, brain fog, panic attacks, or emotional overwhelm.

Everyday tasks, like getting out of bed, staying focused, or making decisions, can become monumental challenges. Some people live with chronic anxiety that makes public spaces feel unsafe. Others experience deep depression that disconnects them from family and friends and leads to low self-worth.

Because these struggles are not visible, others may assume someone is lazy, unreliable, or simply “not trying hard enough.” This misunderstanding can lead to shame, isolation, and even resistance to seeking help.

But the truth is: invisible doesn’t mean imaginary. These are real disabilities, and they require real understanding, support, and accommodation.

People with invisible disabilities are usually BIG empaths. They feel an energy before they walk into a room. They can be confident living on their own and have real relationships with themselves. Being alone is different than being lonely. If you can be alone and enjoy your own company, that is a huge feat. 

A person’s contribution to society does not have to be monetary or involve a large group of friends.

Guiding a child, family member, or a dear friend to lead a meaningful life is more important than finding a corporate job. However, the reality of not having a corporate job means limited or no benefits and the potential for little contribution to social security as a savings plan. Some people will always need state and federal support, and as this administration continues to strip away benefits that they themselves do not need or care to understand, it puts the burden on families to support those in need.

Most people who receive benefits are not looking for handouts; they need them because the structures of an individualistic society do not work. We are not robots, cookie-cutter versions of one another that can fit into this rigid industrialized society.

We have to blend capitalism with systems of support

Have you ever tried to get government support? Have you ever had to apply for benefits of any kind? 

People are so quick to judge that there are too many handouts, fraud, and manipulation of the system. Do they really know? It’s only what they hear in their quick snippets of what those in power say. There are certainly those who take advantage of the system, but I’d like to think that the number of those is lower than the number of those who do need the help. Frankly, those have to be some very intelligent people who work the system like they do because it is not an easy thing to do. 

It is extremely difficult to get support. 

There are multiple hoops and red tape with barriers at every turn. Now imagine all the people living on the streets trying to get these benefits if they don’t have someone to advocate for them. It’s not let’s drug them and forget about them so they don’t bother us anymore. Medication management is not an easy path, and it often forgoes the other pieces needed for stabilization.

This is not about more medication management and deprescribing. It’s about real recovery with supported systems that include mind, body, and spirit. Looking at the whole person, not just their DSM diagnosis and drug prescribing. 

For more discussion on “ The Spiritual Side of Parenting”, please join us on Wednesday, July 22 at 6pm for our free, online Family Sanity event. 

Click here to get your ticket now!